what are you making impossible with “I can’t?”

I can’t.

a simple sentence we say without thinking.

I can’t leave my job. I can’t afford it. I can’t start over. I can’t say no. I can’t do that on my own. I can’t change now.

I can’t is the real limitation. what I can’t really means:

I’m scared. I don’t know how. I don’t want to. I’ve never done this before.

and those are very different things.

when we repeatedly tell ourselves “I can’t” we stop finding solutions. the brain starts treating the statement as fact rather than a thought.

that’s where we get stuck.

try changing the question

the next time you hear yourself say “I can’t,” pause.

don’t force yourself to believe you can. instead ask, is it really that I can’t or is it the I don’t know how?

then get specific.

instead of “I can’t leave my job,” try: I don’t know how I would support myself if I left, but willing to explore all possibilities.

now you have something you can work with.

instead of: “I can’t change my life,” try “I don’t know what the first step is, but I’m open to figuring it out.”

I can’t becomes what would need to change for this to become possible? that question creates movement and action.

start with pressing the pause to notice what is truly holding us back, to witness the story we’ve been repeating for so long we’ve stopped questioning what’s possible.