stop going back for what has already passed

we make life harder than it needs to be.

something doesn’t go the way we wanted so we go back and try to fix it. we replay events, conversations and wonder what we should have said. we wish someone would have behaved differently. we think about the opportunity missed.

and then we spend a lot of energy trying to pick it back up.

it’s gone.

and i don’t mean that in a depressing way. there is freedom in admitting it, it’s over.

you don’t have to keep trying to make yesterday work. you can look at what is actually in front of you and ask a much simpler question: what can i do with this?

maybe your plans have changed. fine. what can you do with the new circumstances?

maybe you’re not where you thought you’d be. okay. what can you do with where you are?

maybe the person expected to be in your life isn’t there anymore. so what does your life feel like now?

this is where i believe we can get ourselves stuck.

we’re trying to build today with what happened yesterday.

and life doesn’t work that way.

think about cooking dinner. you open the fridge and realize you don’t have all the ingredients. you can be annoyed or you can look at what you do have. it might not be what your originally planned, it might be even better.

life is like that.

we don’t always get the ingredients we wanted. but we still have to make dinner

so instead of asking what you’re missing, look at what is actually available to you.

who is here?

what opportunities are here?

what resources do you have?

what can you change?

what are you ready to let go of?

what can you enjoy now without needing something else?

you don’t have to love the circumstances to work with, you just have to stop fighting the circumstances you’re in.